“Ah, how foolish I was.”
I regret it.
To have fallen so deeply…
I shouldn’t have given everything of Kwon Jae-jin away, my memories or my eyes, all of him…
I shouldn’t have allowed anything, just should have been like that…
I detest Seo Ui-woo and resent him so much that my heart feels crushed. The amount of sorrow I feel for having let him into my heart, even if unintentionally, is excruciating. No, it’s thousands of times worse than that. The pain now is even more intense than the horrifying experience I had when Kwon Jae-jin died, caught in the gate, his limbs torn apart in different directions.
If Kwon Jae-jin were to cry now, his tears would be bloody, and he would cough blood if he sobbed.
It would be better to have every bone shattered, flesh eaten by maggots and centipedes, and skinless body scorched by fire than to feel the pain he’s experiencing now.
“Jae-jin, aren’t you hungry? Should I make something for you?”
Seo Ui-woo’s whisper could be heard next to Kwon Jae-jin, who was holed up in the bedroom.
Kwon Jae-jin lay there blankly, as if he couldn’t hear anything, with a white blanket pulled over his head to the very top. Seo Ui-woo narrowed his long eyes and carefully lifted the corner of the blanket.
“You should eat. You like eating, Jae-jin.”
Seo Ui-woo treated Kwon Jae-jin like a wild animal that had been hurt and was hiding in a cave, being careful not to startle him as he lifted the blanket a little more. Then, Kwon Jae-jin’s wide-open eyes met his gaze.
His eyes were bloodshot with rage, and it was apparent from the emotions that surged from within him.
“I’m fine. I won’t eat.”
Jae-jin immediately refused, turning his head away. He seemed not to want to meet Seo Ui-woo’s gaze, and even the thought of sharing the same space and breathing the same air seemed revolting to him.
“Then, how about some water? Shall I get you some water?”
Seo Ui-woo brought over a glass using his abilities. The clear and cool water rippled.
“Your throat seems dry. Your voice is all rough.”
“…”
“You don’t want water either? Don’t need it?”
When Kwon Jae-jin didn’t answer, Seo Ui-woo left the glass of water on the nightstand beside the bed. He pressed the lamp switch, turning on the light and creating a brighter and warmer atmosphere.
“Umm… are you going to sleep like this? It’s only five in the afternoon.”
“…”
“Hey, want to go see the ocean with me?”
“…”
“I’ll take you there now. Let’s hold hands again. The sea is blue, you know.”
“…”
“Or there’s a canyon in the mountain here. It’s private property, so no one can come. Wanna go with me?”
“…”
“Jae-jin?”
“…”
“…Jae-jin?”
“…”
“Can you please stop for a second and look at me? Yeah?”
Seo Ui-woo slipped his hand under the blanket. His gaze had been distant for quite a while now. A heavy longing and a deep craving were strangely twisted, giving off a sinister and precarious light.
Gripping the edge of the eyes that threatened to twist into chilliness, Seo Ui-woo curled his eyes. He gently smiled and touched Kwon Jae-jin’s neck, who was curled up.
“You wanted this, Jae-jin.”
Seo Ui-woo’s fingertips caressed the back of the neck, tender and thrilling.
“You told me to trust you. That’s why I told you.”
“…don’t.”
“I could have hidden it if I wanted to. I could have just ignored how many holes you have in your head, Kwon Jae-jin. But I didn’t, did I?”
“…Seo Ui-woo, keep your hands off me.”
“I didn’t deceive anything and told you everything. I opened up to trust you, Kwon Jae-jin, because it seemed like you were being honest with me. I wanted to be honest, too, thinking it would be better for us…”
“…”
“Even now, I’m not doing anything to you, Jae-jin. So why are you avoiding me like this? Do you hate me now?”
Seo Ui-woo quietly tickled the back of the neck.
He traced the skin slowly along the neckline, touching the rapidly beating carotid artery. He felt Kwon Jae-jin’s pulse.
“Why are you doing this to me, Jae-jin?”
“Just stop it…”
“Why do you keep doing this to me?”
“Ha… Just, please. Leave me alone. Or else, do I really have to say it myself for you to understand?”
Kwon Jae-jin threw off the blanket and got up.
✧˚·̩̩̥͙˚̩̥̩̥·̩̩̥͙✧·̩̩̥͙˚̩̥̩̥˚·̩̩̥͙✧ 𝑔𝓇𝒶𝓋𝒾𝓉𝓎𝓃𝑜𝓋𝑒𝓁𝓈 ✧˚·̩̩̥͙˚̩̥̩̥·̩̩̥͙✧·̩̩̥͙˚̩̥̩̥˚·̩̩̥͙✧
